It can be a lonely scene – empty picnic tables. Empty, desolate, sitting and waiting. They are waiting to e enjoyed. Pursuing – nothing.
But, they are there, prepared, open and ready.
The heart of a Mom is similar – it can be empty, desolate, sitting and waiting. But, what about the pursuing part? What about that original desire to feel life in the womb and hold the beauty of a babe in our arms.
Did that desire to bring forth life contain the joy of our hearts. Or, were we set off course by the things that work hard to steal our joy?
I stand and look at those picnic benches.
The scenes, both off at a distance, my camera able to reach, my eyes straining. The sky is overcast, a light breeze tickles my cheek and I feel the dampness of my skin as tiny droplets of rain fall.
I wonder, will the heavens open up again with the torrential downpour that has kept us from those picnic tables?
Around me, the children are laughing and enjoying the day. The wind, rain – it is not impeding their joy. It’s adding to this adventure we took. It was not an easy adventure and to share pictures would not be the right thing to do. Alas, I love spending time with friends…..but, to share pictures of our children and their children running and playing, I feel would be to share parts of their lives….but, this is my story, we all have our own.
The sound of laughter fills the air. There have been too many sugary treats – taffy, cider, chocolate, fudge….the list goes on, the laughter is music to my ears….and yet those picnic tables remain empty.
One – one table I notice is in the midst of an overgrown area that, I’m not sure I would want to walk to. It looks dangerous, full of secrets that could lead to hurt…….and my mind goes to Moms across this world.
How many of us sit alone with our heads bowed in shame? Are we afraid of the past, the judgement, the condemnation that the world wants to cast upon us? I say ‘us’ because I’ve been there.
Remember, I gave myself away and the hearts in this home know the pain of losing a child, miracles and the pain of making a choice to end the lives of others.
Yet, as I ponder these thoughts, I look at my beautiful friend. Oh, her beauty shines from the inside. There are days the world is heavy upon her shoulders and she sits, prays and seeks the one who will lighten the burden – for his is light – the yoke of the lamb.
She loves me in spite of my past and at the same time, because of my past, she seems to hold me closer and love me. She is sharing his love with me….and that is what I want to do with you.
Sweet friend, I can sit here and tell you how much you matter, how much your time with your children will impact their lives and the lives of those to come….but, until you feel his love, seek him in all things….the search for acceptance and love will continue.
If you are truly wanting to find joy, seek him first. In that joy, in that search, you will find the truth and the strength to be the Mom he created you to be.
The road will not be easy and of course, the dirty floors, laundry and never-ending need to prepare good meals, while loving our family will continue – we can do all things through Christ….and together we can love one another, encourage and share truth.
Praying you are blessed today